Sunday, February 25, 2018

A Calligraphy Enthusiast with a Slight Overbite

Hannah introduced me to a drawing app on her iPad. Which is the best thing since sliced bread. She let me color on it all day and all through the fireside until we had a really quality pirate ship of death. Also, my stake food guy hooked me up with double ice cream again, so the day ended well. 

Basketball is getting increasingly competitive. Mama Bale has been able to get some younger, stronger recruits who are willing to body me up. I'm still holding back a little just because I'm so nervous I'm gonna mess myself up again. Also my knee still hurts regularly, which makes me just a tad nervous. (Hannah also leveled with me on this; she royally screwed her knee up a few years ago and we're in the same boat.)

Trevor's senior night. Crushed NFA.
And Mom even got to be there to rep him.
I got an oil change! Hooray for taking care of my car! Also the guy told me it's time to flush everything - power steering, coolant, etc. Somebody, please tell me if this is real.

Peter, my mysteriously-aged man friend, literally blew my brain with his Javascript intro that my nose instantly started bleeding. And didn't stop for a long time. 

Chance from France and I hit up a French night - complete with eclairs and crepes, which I suppose are substitutes for a baguette. It was awesome and I loved speaking and listening to real French again. 

There was an Essential Oils conference on Saturday that Swing (my place of employment) had a booth at. There was 5 reps there, so I made myself the official band-aid hander-outer. And boyyyy, did I do my job well! We got rid of so many band-aid holders with our logo on it. I was dishing out the swag.

Step right up, everything is free
That's how we do it down at Swing PT!

After acquiring my free breakfast, I ditched for the temple with our stake. Bart/Sis Winters and I were the only ones in our session. But we met up with the baptistry people for an activity at Federico's. Where we just ate free carné asada fries.

I brought some to Hannah at her work, in exchange for a free scoop of PB/Chocolate ice cream. And we chatted for a while about some exciting things coming up.

Like how she, Joe, and Courtney came up with a ward weight-loss challenge that I'm STOKED about. Competition + exercise = life. And if I can win the money pot, more's the better. If not, at least "our ward's gonna be HOT" according to Joe Bale.

My pondering scripture of the week. Slash forever. 

Sunday, February 18, 2018

Fare Thee Well, Little Dinner

Sister Cassens reported to the MTC this Wednesday, so we had a nice little gathering of close friends on Sunday to send her off. It was cute. We got to hear Braden's first kiss story "Resurrection Girl" and drink a lot of good juice. And obv, bask in the presence of our future missionary.

This is the original.
And voila, le masterpiece. By Braden. 
Talked to Rod after Institute, per usual. My friend's ex's family slashed his tires. And I gave Aaron this huge migrating welt.

I could push the juice around. It was quite interesting.
Wednesday was Valentine's Day. Our ward's vday plans were kind of a squash, but I got to chat with Trev Nally about a few plans we've got for these kids. And I played basketball with some old ladies and children, which made me feel much more confident about my skills.

Love this. All YSA's should understand this.
I'm usually not a huge fan of service projects where we all go clean up a park. BUT, our stake did a great job teaming up with the parks & rec division to make it actually useful service. And I got several scratches while aggressively hacksawing debris - so no complaints.

My favorite post from our ward's scripture study page, New Heart 2018.
BACKSTORY: It's the winter Olympics rn. And since they're in Korea, the only thing on during the day is curling. Seriously, I get 24/7 curling. Which frankly is the only sport I'd ever have a chance at winning in the actual Olympics.

And guess who has a curling club? Phoenix. Gosh, I love this place.

So naturally I went. We did some stations to learn the basics and we played a few rounds. Luckily, we had Greg and Sherie on our team to help us out. Seriously, they were great. They were real teammates - and old pros, having played consistently since '67. MVPs.

Champs. Get ready, Olympics 2k22
And we had delicious pizza afterwards and I was so happy. And then we hit up a dance - which was a blast. And by this point I felt like I hadn't showered in literal weeks, but it's fine because everyone came over to my place afterwards for a round of MLK or Black Rapper?

And speaking of holiday traditions that need to continue, this year's round of Bum Poems:

Roses are red, our President's Trump
So there ain't any rules against touching your rump.

Roses are red, your booty's superior,
I never have seen such a dang fine posterior.

Roses are red, I've gotten you some
Because I really like you, and your smile, and your bum.

Roses are red, I know it's not autumn,
But would you really leaf if I touched your bottom?

Roses are red, and so well designed
Almost as pretty as your round behind.

Roses are red and from here to our borders,
Nothing compares to your lovely hindquarters.

Roses are red, and do you preside
Over the club of the finest and nicest backsides?

Roses are red, now look at that fairy there-
If she'd grant me one wish, I'd be touching your derriere. 

Roses are red, I'm watching you strut, 
Girl you got so much confidence and a really nice butt.

Roses are red, my decision is clear:
I'd hold your hand and I'd handle your rear.

Roses are red, teachers say 'shush'
When you yell out loud because I smacked your tush.

Roses are red, on a 1 to 10 scale
Your eyes are a 6, but 11's your tail.

Roses are red, I checked with your nanny
She said it's ok if I check out your fanny.

Roses are red, my life'd be complete
If I could acquire such a marvelous seat.

Roses are red, yellow tulips for Easter
And yet the best flower? Is YOU, with the keister!

Roses are red, check out those guns!
And the traps and the delts and the biceps and buns!

-At this point my friends were pleading for me to stop-

Roses are red, you see what's at stake?
When you ask for more poems about that fine pair of cakes?

Roses are red, poeming doesn't take weeks
If you are well practiced in versing 'bout cheeks.

Roses are red, I suppose I should bend
That's your favorite part, right? THE END.

Sunday, February 11, 2018

Mitochondria is the Powerhouse of the Cell, and other useful things

NOTICE: If you know anyone who wants to house me for free in Flagstaff, AZ, please let me know immediately. Otherwise, I'm committing to the cheapest house I can find, hopefully by the end of today. #lessdebt

In other news, my wonderfully selfless coworker Melissa just got diagnosed with MS. Any prayers are appreciated. 

This week was full of adulting:

I did emissions and registered my car.

I paid my NAU deposit. School starts in August.

I did my taxes.

I learned how to make both lasagna and lemon bread. Yum.

So apparently THIS is a thing that exists in Flag. It's called a vinegaroon, 
aka whip scorpion. Hybrid: scorpion-spider of the GIANT variety. 
I played basketball with my old lady friends - and almost killed a few on some blind picks. My bad. It's hard to tone down the momentum if you don't see them.

A group of us went to laser tag on Friday with the free passes I stole from Institute. I learned my problem isn't so much my aim, it's more the avoiding getting hit part. None of my diving ninja rolls seem to pan out for me, but they are fun. And I have four more passes. 

I had another study session with Peter, during which we determined that I am now an official programmer (albeit a poor one).

And I finally saw The Greatest Showman with Chance from France. I only cried a little, but it was way good. When will the piano music come out? Only time will tell.

Sunday, February 4, 2018

Life Lessons with Naomi Hutchins

All weeks are crazy if you design them that way. Things I learned:

1. Sometimes when you're stuck between a rock and a hard place, you lose to both. And you sweat a lot, but all you can do is hope for the best and bond over shared terrible experiences and chocolate peanut butter bars.

2. It's all fun and games until you actually need something and then you find out who your real friends are. And you're glad you have them. Shoutout to Kaleb this week for spending 5 hours getting my car fixed.

Sub-lesson: never propose at the animal show at Universal.
3. The more often you check that your life is on track, the more likely that your life is actually on track. Which is why I got 18 x-rays at the dentist this week - just in case.

4. It's important to challenge yourself, while understanding your weaknesses. For example, I started playing basketball with a bunch of old ladies as part of my rehab and return to normal sports play. Which turned out to be a great decision because I am one competitive motherlicker and the game could've gotten dangerous with any other players.

Sub-lesson: try not to pose where you're touching someone's
booty, animal or otherwise.
5. Don't procrastinate the day of your repentance. Because then you can get a whole lot more done - whether it be college essays, ward activities, or dates with hot men.

6. Take breaks. Take time for yourself and the people you love. And by that I mean, go to California sometimes to hang out with Ol' Deek and Shennsley. And go to a freaking JOUST because it will be the highlight of your life.

Sub-lesson: if you need something, always try to get it for free first. 
7. Sometimes if you pray really hard and really frequently, you are blessed for your faith and anxiety. Like how I was accepted to NAU before the deadline for Utah's nonrefundable deposit.

8. Sometimes if you pray really hard and really frequently, you aren't. And then the Chin gets a frequent flyer card at the local hospital.

Sub-lesson: try to coordinate your joust experience with the
UCLA basketball team, but never S-daddy.
9. The Lord speaks to us all in different ways. Some people, he speaks to in words of inspiration and hope. Others (#me) respond better to absurdities. Neither are wrong.

10. If you take charge, you can do what you want. This is true for activities, dates, hangouts, movie nights, and really anything in life. Just be aggressive.

Sub-lesson: upgrade your tickets. It's worth it.