Sunday, January 15, 2017

Too Skinny. Not Good For Bearing Sons.

Sunday was my first day back in the ward and apparently we had to retake all of our pictures so they'd be matching in style. Luckily for me, my friend Ryan was taking them, so he hooked me up with a good one. Luckily for him, I actually got to go to SS and sent him updates the entire time based on whatever I was thinking about during the lesson. Needless to say, it was entertaining if not spiritually enlightening.

Tanner picked us up in his low-rider for family dinner at Ben's. It was delicious, as always. Although Hays didn't make a thousand cupcakes for us to devour this time. Funcle Aaron was there and led a game of Expose Yourself (please, there are ladies present!). Um, why does everyone think my dream car is a 15-passenger van?? Been there.

Ahh, family. Isn't about...time?

Monday marked the start of a new school year and I already hate it. I got special permission to skip two of my classes about 70% of the time because they interfere with my clinical assignment. The first 3 days of the week, I have night classes that are 3 hours long (but only once a week). After the Monday one, I went to our ward combined FHE volleyball, chips/salsa, and rootbeer float fest. I like it better when everyone has separate FHEs and only the dedicateds go to our ward sporting events.

Ryan's apartment is back to holding Waffle Wednesdays. That's how we became friends. Also I kept asking who he loved. I'm glad we're friends now because his whole apartment is so delightful. And they feed me on a regular basis.

In other news, the football training room is having a rough time. Our 14 experienced trainers were replaced with 7 less experienced ones who should know stuff, but don't know how to help someone stretch their hamstring... Also our secretary quit last minute for another job. So it's been a bit rough. There are two guys working PT with me that are fairly competent, so it could be worse.

You want to know what couldn't be worse?? By the time my intramural appointment rolled around, all the inner tube water polo schedules were sold freaking out. What. I think I found a team at this point and it'll be nice not to be the captain, but also I want to win.

I spend a lot of my free time doing HW to stay ahead in my classes. Especially the ones that I don't go to. Also studying for the BOC, and by its very nature, the QuizBowl at RMATA in April. Where we will win this year or die trying. And if we're in a van with Aaron again, the dying thing may be more serious of a threat than you think.

Also Series of Unfortunate Events season 1 came out on Netflix Friday. It's way delightful, a word which here means funny, true to the books, and enjoyable to watch despite all the terribly unfortunate events that occur in the lives of the Baudelaire orphans. I would know. I've already watched the whole thing.

And, because I have no other pictures for this week,
here's a picture of the necklace Austin Chambers bit to find out if it was real.
Verdict: Too smooth.
The Breakfast Club remains at large. We met at 7am sharp on Friday to cook up some breakfast burritos together. It's a nice way to start the day- good friends and good food.

Joshie Boy and friend Caleb went ice skating for a long time on Friday. That makes twice now that I've been on the ice. And still, I'm only really good when I go pretty fast. The guys kept trying to teach me technique, but all I have now are some nice bruises and sore hip flexors to show for my efforts.

The next morning, I went to a HIT-style class with Little Brown Girl at VASA. It wasn't bad, but my whole body was sore from skating, so it was hard to tell. I went to the tennis match for one game until they served the free pizza. Then I left to do other important things.

Like go to Joel Zae's house warming party in Orem. It was fun, except I didn't want to talk to new people, so I just played old-style Mario and ate pizza bites with Dragon and Matt. Joel told me that way more boys would be there than girls, so I should just pose sensuously and wait for them to flock, but I went home instead. Then I watched Gatsby and colored.

Sunday, January 8, 2017

We Got Ourselves a City Slicker

Quick shoutout to Chels. Congrats on the engagement. Please don't make me wear burnt orange at your wedding.

I decided I quite like vacations. This one has been my favorite so far. Everyone was actually at home for Christmas (except Kevin...) and found on the schedule were both delicious meals and the regular Hutchins shenanigans. Decluttering occurred, basketball games attended, much family and all the ridiculosity y compris. Voila:

Tuesday was my last real day at home, so I brought the childies up to Krempy's, where we enjoyed some hilarious poetry on the subjects of vomiting, dieting, and aging (see where I get it??). We also ate some great food, thanks to Mimi. And we even got back in time for Trevor's basketball game, which was killer. (The boy had 30 points!)

The Krempy, The Mimi, The Moriah. 
Wednesday I was on planes all day. After a short jaunt down to Baltimore, I had a four hour ride to SLC sitting next to a large man with excruciatingly severe body odor. (Actually those are the lyrics in Albuquerque describing the plane ride from hell. Mine only including an extremely large man and intense discomfort for the duration).

The Grandparents and I
Upon arrival, I got to catch up with the delightful Rachel May, who also helped accomplish my grocery shopping and dinner for the evening. MVP. The girl is a saint.


With nothing on the table, and no interest in studying for a test I now can't take for several months, I did a lot of relaxing. Also working out, which is why my muscles are wonderfully sore today. Also I read at least six books. Over the remainder of the week, I watched Avatar, Legend of the Seeker, the Hobbit, and Stick It, all while working on my comic book, which is coming along, however slowly. I have increasing respect for comic bookers everywhere.

I did perform at the Provo Mansion House's poetry/song night. Bryson and Tate are such flatterers, how could I refuse? After an introductory rap, I did a few pieces as noted below. I think they're rather silly, but as long as they're appreciated I'll keep performing.

Ballads and Rhymes.
Funcle Aaron was in town for the weekend, so we crashed the BYU v Pacific game, which was less entertaining because it was such a blowout. We snagged some good seats though, and caught some quality dancing.
IG pic creds: @a911h
Afterwards, the magnificent Emarie Covey and I tagged along with the in-laws to see Moana. It was pretty decent. And we only spilled half our popcorn on the ground. Emarie, as per usual, exceeded all expectations.

End. Here are the poems:

Ode to the Malt Shoppe

If you’re looking around cause you’re hungAry
Our friends all say it’s the place to be
We’ve got all the flavors from A to Z
Come down and dine at the Malt ShoppE!

The health inspections didn’t go as planned
So Susie’s cleaning wishes were our command
Just taking a look at all the rat poop we’ve found
It might just be better if it burned to the ground.

We’ve got quite a few holes in our parking lot
I don’t know if we’ll ever fix them or not
And we better not let the ice cream run low
Cause all of America will be the first ones to go.

The Malt Shoppe does have one good thing
And that’s the music the Jukebox brings
The awkward dancers are in plain sight
When you visit the Malt Shoppe each Saturday night.

Although most of our food is dripping with grease
It’s not a crime, so don’t call the police!
Why you even stop by is a mystery
To all those who work at the Malt ShoppE

There’s a Moment
New kicks slick on the court, the crowd roars
Dimples spin off fingertips, the ball soars
Sprinting upcourt, it’s less about the score
Though the crowd yells and cheers and asks for more-
There’s a moment.
A moment when you’re combing your options and the clock keeps on going, but everything seems to go in slow motion-
There’s a moment.
A moment when you know what you’ve chosen and low-key you’re Kobe and know how to be posting…up.
And it’s enough.
Scan the man-to-man as the ball’s reversed
Wingspan fans as if the plan’s rehearsed
Demand the rock, pure power bursts
Drop step, pump fake, less a need than a thirst
There’s a moment.
A moment when the court is frozen and there’s no room for hoping you’re the better opponent.
There’s a moment.
A moment when your will is focused and the moves start flowing and it’s not mechanics, it’s poet-try.
And it’s liberating.
Pouring blood, sweat, and tears into the fight
Because might, not right, wins title tonight
Fire ignites, shot’s on aim and that’s hella tight

It’s not the score, but the game, cuz ball is life.

Sunday, January 1, 2017

How do you know so much about swallows?

It was a pretty chill week. Mostly I hung out with Moriah, family MVP. She’s delightful and crazy and a fun diversion to the less fun work I’ve been doing. She’s helped me film some funny videos, accompanies me on library runs, and is always good for a game of Uno. She hugs me lots.

Who's your favorite mom? Uh...Mom. Oh, you mean Kelly D. Hutchins?
This week, she told Hannah and I, “You guys are fun. Like really, really fun.” She also asks for “the crusty crust” on a regular basis – meaning warm, crusty baguettes dipped in oil and spices. I made it once over the summer and she’s currently obsessed.

Did you know this was a thing? The old Xandino, following in my footsteps.
Moriah isn’t a big movie watcher, but for some reason she loved watching Star Wars with me on the big screen (in our family room) over the summer. She also doesn’t mind watching things on my computer or phone, apparently. I had the idea that she might appreciate Monster’s Inc. We’re 2 watches in and she’s retaining the story line fairly well.
Ignore my sickly-looking legs and gaze at my scruggly family.
I like them medium to high amounts.
A family activity of the break is the game Injustice. Pretty sure I’m currently the most successful, thanks to a lucky mystery character I bought who is boss. It’s simple to learn, easy to progress, and fun to compare with each other. Even Greg is playing.

It looks better in the sunshine, promise. Still pretty cool.
We visited the temple on Thursday. It was delightful being in the Hartford temple, with its colonial theme in the heart of such a historic part of the country. I also saw my alternate family, the Cramers. Also, the Bells were practically throwing cookies at us as we left. It was just so good. I love temples. Then the Chin took us out to a gourmet hamburger joint, which was also good.

Friday I dropped Hannah off at the airport and cruised on up to MA for Emily’s bball game, Aaron’s reffing, and Adam’s beard. I killed Mason at mini PIG and died last minute in our Oregon Trail card game. The only reason I even got close was because I was at meager rations, grueling pace.

My older and much wiser cousin. Who is willing to pay Mason NOT to
 shoot me with his new nerf guns. What a champ.
At various times, we looked over Guilt. In total, there are more than 3000 guilts possible. Also most of the game is relevant to the older half of the family, so I had to teach the younger kids some of our legacy.
I wish this kid was around a bit more often. If I ever make it up to Bar Harbor...
I spent New Years Eve morning on a run. Then at the local soup kitchen with everyone except the Chin, who backed out early because he thought there were too many helpers. Little did he know, once things got kicking, we were zooping around like headless chickens. We played Shannon’s game King of Tokyo, which is pretty fun. We ended with the NYE classic, Monty Python and the Holy Grail, drank some Martinelli’s, and were in bed by 12:04.

This family is a bunch of straight noodles. They’re always wigging around, playing pillow ball, and then taking communal naps all over the house. Love it.