Somebody Punch That Guy

A Civilized Rant on Planet Earth II: Why have I never seen this? I love Hans Zimmer, I love obscure animal facts, and I love Sunday relaxing. I want the predators to win more, but otherwise I'm obsessed with everything about this, watched three episodes in a row and was late to church.

Sunday was also monumental because I was released, had my last dinner groups, and watched Cars. Sometimes you're in the mood for that. And I was definitely in the mood.

 

The Crew(TM) played round two of True American. Nobody knows why, because we regret it every time. Then we watched Clue, because it's one of the best movies of all time.

This was my last official week in Surprise, Arizona. So obvioussslllyyy I had to have some time with Hannah Merrell, my personal angel (but with the swag of Kronk's shoulder devil) for the last year. I just love how hyped she gets for my life - makes me excited to be me and boosts my confidence about literally everything.

Pre-wedding shenanigans.

Also got to spend some time with Keaton, who's been the official Best Committee Member of the Year (again, not hard), but I've been grateful for his help and sarcasm. I'm only sorry we didn't hit it off earlier.

After a long couple of plane rides and 53 minutes of sleep, I made it to CT. I kept my sweatshirt on while we trudged through 80/80 mosquito forestland to the Farmington town clerk's office. That lady was tryna get me married to anyone - first Markies, then Hannah, then Trevor. Three strikes, woman.



We continued the 48-hour setup at the church headed by the one and only Mama Sama. (And people think I'm  extra.) We ended the day just in time for Moriah, Shennsley, Shiboi, and I to take our traditional 1/4 mile hike (/bouldering excursion) to Glacier Park. Moriah hated it, as usual.

But, the light at the end of the tunnel was Applebees - where Moriah was SO proud that she skunked us by chugging an entire cup of lemonade in the 30s we had our backs turned. Dinner was good, but both Xandino and I went round two with leftover dumplings during games later on. And I zonked out for Star Wars later, despite the two other humans infiltrating my bed-couch.

Faux Kevin was an integral part of our day.

I ran the Chin's speed walk loop and remembered how sweaty I could get in near full-capacity humidity. (Still didn't shower, just for spite, Shiboi.) Moriah and I played Uno and utilized the tire swing and wreaked general havoc on the town.

Markies' family showed up for an outdoor BBQ and had Kelly in hard grandma mode for the next several days. The kids were cute, Moriah refused to sit next to me, and CJ christened me as his favorite family member - overall success. The night continued to be beneficial when Shennsley and Shiboi joined me for a Russia-sponsored pedicure. Hands-down, best experience. Shiboi hated it.



We woke up early for the first temple sealing of the day. This, however, did not stop any of the temple ladies from staring daggers in our direction all day. I'll take most of the blame for that, but I had many accomplices. BUT Hannah and Markies are married and looked great. Got my brotha for a brother-in-law. Lessss goooo.

Some of mom's ward friends made us a delicious luncheon that I'm so glad I did not have to prepare myself. I took a nap before helping Hannah back into her corset and chauffeuring humans to the reception hall. Which was transformed. Good freaking work, Kel. It looked awesome, the food was delicious, the festivities were further stimulated by Funcle Aaron. But Moriah ruled the dance floor. And yours truly served as the getaway driver to paradise (aka Providence).

Welcome to the Chins. 

We were exhausted post-festivities. My vehicle tried to pick up a kid from church and ended up being late after a wild goose chase - only to find him sitting in the foyer when we arrived. Skunked. We ate leftover pasta during SS and skipped third hour to mentally prepare for a long drive.

Deek, Shennsley, Moriah, Isabelle, Xandino, and I all shipped up to Boston to drop Derek off at college (again). Then we moved some boxes in exchange for food and Uno time at the Krempy's. And stopped off at Funcle's (a must-see) for a chat on "the elephant in the room" before heading home again. A week of fun, family, and farts (because Moriah is involved). Worth it.

Who's the Uno King? Xandino, because I wanted the game to end.